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egregious '80's music: get out of my dreams (and into my car) (billy ocean)
Nov 5th, 2009 by wrekehavoc

but why?

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there are several artists in the 1980s who make it difficult for a hater music critic like myself. billy ocean is one of those people. his musical output in the 1980s is a scourge on the face of the musical earth.  i mean, how can you pick when you can choose from such works as suddenly (which, i would add was my brother and sister-in-law’s wedding song — this being BTD, the guy who probably single-handedly hepled influence my complete and utter neurosis fascination with rock, which tells you that love does strange things to people), there’ll be sad songs (to make you cry) (yeah… like this one), soundtrack staple when the going gets tough, and of course, his mega-hit, caribyooon queen caribbean queen (now we’re sharing the same dream… would that be the one about world domination? nope. didn’t think so.) yes, millions swooned to billy ocean’s mellow sound, including chris rock’s sister on everybody hates chris.

but not me.

the man has an inviting voice… and what does he do? he orders me to get into his vehicle. do i know whether he’s been drinking? do i know whether he’s got a record? do i know whether he even has a license?  no. but somehow, simply by virtue of the fact that he has been dreaming about me, i am supposed to drop what i’m doing and go for a drive with him? mr. ocean, didn’t your mom teach you a thing or two about how to treat a lady?

i have the feeling that part of what made this song a hit was the video. if you look, you’ll notice some cutting edge (for 1988) animation interacting with ocean, the same sort of thing your homegirl paula abdul would later use. (is that a duck witha boombox?) yep. cartoon fish are what passes for entertainment. and the new twist on the mousy librarian who takes her glasses off and pulls her hair down is the lady at the carwash who has some satin number underneath her work jumper. of course, her outfit cannot compare with ocean’s giant white muu-muu of a caftan suit. ah, eighties videos and songs. you think it can’t get much worse than this.

but it can.


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