yeah, you heard me.
i will be the first person to tell you that i hate arguments. some people adore conflict and can’t wait to jump in, fangs bared, to tear into a topic. that person would not be me. as tori amos once sang, i believe in peace, (bitch). i never think of the truly clever thing to say in such situations until hours or days afterwards. i fumble. in short, i need time to think before i speak. i know that once the words are out of the mouth, it is nearly impossible to take them back.
but i also realize that there are times when one must put her big girl panties on and deal with uncomfortable situations. and when i have taken the trouble to talk to someone, calmly, about something that really disturbs me, one of the worst things you can say to me back is whatever. it’s as if my very existence is being discounted, tossed away like a used kleenex. and then, watch out. i won’t be as careful with my words since you apparently didn’t appreciate what i said. you don’t have to agree with me, but you do have to respect me. and since i have been disrespected, well, hell hath no fury like a woman whatevered.
i often hear plenty of people do this, particularly younger folks. when did it become okay to be fresh in conversation? it’s as if they’re done, and they don’t care about resolution — their ideas are the only important ones. a big thank you goes out to the mostly baby boomers who have somehow allowed their kids to shut down others in a thoughtless way.
maybe i ought to burst out into song the next time someone says the W word to me. my singing is punishment enough, i suspect, especially when attempting to sing along with aretha.