Category: writers in motion

Writer in Motion – Week Four

Writer in Motion – Week Four

The week in which I post the version after receiving helpful critiques from an editor. Big thanks to Justine Manzano for her helpful thoughts on my work! I especially appreciate what she did, as most of the people in the group wrote short stories. I, on the the hand, decided to imagine the start of a novel. That’s something altogether different.

And before I continue, another big thanks for the RewriteIt Club for posting an interview with me this week! Not scary at all, er, was it!?

Anywho… Justine made some helpful suggestions.

  1. Some extraneous info in the second para;
  2. A grammatical oops in the third para; and, most importantly
  3. We have character growth, but we don’t see any motivation. So we know that Cami has been into Ben, and that she has been going through this ritual of watching him while she’s there, and aside from watching a couple make out, we really don’t get any sense of what has shifted that makes her decide that she’ll speak to him.

Yeah, that number 3 comment made me think a bit. So I ended up with this. Here’s hoping it works.

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Writers In Motion – Week Three

Writers In Motion – Week Three

When last we left our hero, it was the 80s. But something about Tom Petty and the song struck me, and, well, here we are. A big thank you to the two critique partners who provided some wonderful insights. I was so hell-bent on keeping my word count to 500 that I did not explore a thing or two. However, seeing as others are in the 1000+ word count, I figured going s l i g h t l y over 500 would not break the bank at Monte Carlo. So now, we are involving Cami with Ben…or at least, on her way to finally interacting with Ben.

So here we go…  Dare to compare it with last week. And this week, I will send it off to an editor for the editor’s perspective. If that is as useful as the feedback I received from my CPs, it should be enlightening!

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Writer in Motion – Week Two

Writer in Motion – Week Two

So this is the week where we take last week’s word vomit rough draft and do an edit. I do a lot of editing in my head, but I am trying to break down the process a little, as the whole point of this exercise is to see how people do it.

First, I will probably break this down into more bite-size pieces — both paras and sentences.

Then, I’ll look in places to see repetitive things. For example, “brayed noisily”–is there really any other kind of braying? Not in my world. I’m keeping zeppoles, even though it is something people probably will have to look up. Zeppoles are a fixture on the Jersey Shore, where the story is taking place. (Zeppoles? Fried dough with powdered sugar on them. When made well, they are simply heavenly.)

I felt like pushing the date back of the time period a little, so I changed the song blasting on the Boardwalk. (So sue me.) We’re now in 1979, for those keeping score. It just felt better to me. The edge of a decade. The edge of…something happening.

So this is what happened.

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Writers In Motion – First Draft

Writers In Motion – First Draft

So yeah. I wrote something. It’s unedited. Unformed. But it’s inspired by the sky in the picture. Don’t know why the sky made me think of a boardwalk town, but it did.  I don’t usually write YA stuff, either, so that was kind of random. But you never know where you brain can take you with the right inspo.

Some folks are writing short stories. I was feeling more like the start of a novel. Rhyme or reason? You got me there. Maybe it’s wishful thinking, as I don’t know whether I will get down the shore this summer?

Feel free to comment and constructively critique. 🙂

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i’m baa-aaack

i’m baa-aaack

did you miss me?

so yeah. as mark twain once wrote, “reports of my death are greatly exaggerated.” (have mercy!) while i have been blogging in one way or another since 2002 (which is like when dinos walked the earth, or some such), i took a break a few years ago. i wrote a few things, like

this

and this

and this

and this

and, well, you get the picture.

but for those of you who i am just meeting because of Writers In Motion, well howwww-DEE! feel free to kick the tires around here, though realize that i have a potty mouth AND i have historically written sans capital letters on my site (because i can). (and if that’s annoying, rest assured that my draft will use CAPITALS. and PUNCTUATION. and stuff. because i know the rules. i just like to break them from time to time.)

i am very excited to be taking part in this process where i am going to magically conjure up a draft which will likely be in SERIOUS need of TLC…and will shape it up, right before your eyes, with a little help from my friends.

so now, to think about this photo

 

 

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