i’m absolutely distressed reading this story.

it raises a certain point that absolutely hit home with me. i spent two weeks in the hospital in february (sadly, not for something as happy as a birth), and it taught me one thing: you have to be a VERY strong advocate for yourself or, if you aren’t in any condition to advocate for yourself, you really need someone there to be it, whether it is a partner, a relative, a very good friend — someone who isn’t shy and isn’t afraid to hunt down people and tell them when things are needed. after going into serious convulsions because the nurse on duty wouldn’t give me benadryl before giving my an IV full of blood products (and i was too weak to argue and it was midnight, so no one was there with me), i am absolutely convinced of that. i was supposed to have tests that never happened; i was supposed to get meds i never got. and since my husband was trying his best to keep it together with the kids, i just couldn’t ask him to do more. between the IVs in my arms and the awful way i felt, i just didn’t have it in me to speak up.

believe me when i say that i am probably one of the last people to criticize the medical establishment; i have been spoiled for many years by having both good doctors as well as a family member who is a physician who i think the world of and a close friend who is a kick-butt nurse. but after being in the hospital for a bit of time, i feel very downhearted about the way people are treated there. it can be a demeaning, disabling experience. you w a i t a thousand years for anything. i was so frustrated waiting one day i tried to do something for myself and ended up hitting myself in the head on the bedside table (which ultimately resulted in my needing a scan.) i felt like people patronized me. (G-d only knows how elderly people are treated.) i could go on, but i am sure no one wants to hear me whine a lot. suffice to say, i have gone from someone who used to not fear hospital treatment to someone who would definitely hesitate before going in.

just thinking about how this poor man and woman were ignored brings me to tears. i know it’s easy to fall into a routine with our jobs but there are some jobs where nothing should ever be treated as routine. when you are working in a hospital, you deal with people who don’t have routine medical situations. having a baby = not routine. yes, people do it every day, some with and some without medical intervention. but during the process, whether we like to think of it or not, your life is imperiled somewhat. there’s a reason some women died in childbirth in the old days — sometimes, things go awry. i like to think that far fewer women (and children) die now in childbirth because we are prepared for these possibilities. but the preparation requires that no one takes for granted the safeguards necessary in the process. when washing your hands, or wearing a mask, or actually l i s t e n i n g to a patient in peril is taken for granted, then people are not taking their jobs seriously, patients are not safe.

every interaction in a hospital requires care, imho.