i continue to rack up the points that will ultimately send me to bad mom hell. highlights:

1) i just taught my kids how to do the time warp. (c’mon kids, it’s just a pelvic thrust!)

2) instead of instilling a respect for the office of President, i informed 7.5 year old BC that “George Bush is an idiot.“.

BC: so mama, you mean you don’t like the President?

Me: no, sweetpea, i don’t.

BC: why, mama?

Me: because he isn’t a very smart person. and because he is doing things i don’t like.

BC: like what, mama?

Me: ::hyperventilating because i can’t even try to begin here:: what would you like for dinner?

3) three-year-old Jools likes the word penis; but he has decided that he doesn’t want to have one if girls can’t have one.

Jools: mommy, i don’t want a penis. girls don’t have a penis.

Me: ::hyperventilating because i once again can’t even try to begin here:: Julian, you aren’t a girl. you’re a boy. boys have penises.

Jools: mommy, are you a girl?

Me: yes, honey.

Jools: do you want a penis?

Me: no, dr. freud.

Jools: what’s a foyd?

4) and finally, we signed BC up to dance on a local show. i’m sure she could care less, but mommy wants to see X.