SIDEBAR
»
S
I
D
E
B
A
R
«
clean
March 31st, 2010 by wrekehavoc

it’s official:  i am laundry-challenged.

i grew up in a family where my mom or dad pretty much did the laundry for everyone in the house; so when i got married, i figured that BS and i would just do giant loads of each other’s laundry and move on with life. after all, it doesn’t really bother me to do laundry; it’s not like i have to go down to the river and beat the clothes on rocks.  at the time, i was usually too bothered to separate lights from whites from darks.

this offended his laundry sensibilities; BS told me he would do his own.

for about 30 seconds, my nose was out of joint about this until i realized, hell, i only have to do my own laundry.

and so it went. two kids later, i am the primary laundress around here — though BS still does his own laundry. i wash the kids’ clothes except for certain key moments. like when there’s barf all over them. or, better yet, a bucket of swallowed blood.  then, my beloved spouse steps up to the plate and takes on the worst of the body fluids.

(which i sincerely appreciate, i would add.)

anyway, we have had our laundry-related mishaps. for example, there was the time when preschool aged jools left a red crayon in his pocket… a crayon which melted all over our clothes when it hit the dryer.  BS was not amused. while several articles of clothing simply could not be rehabbed and thus had to go to the giant hamper in the sky, i still needed to clean out the drum of the dryer, which had lots of red streaks splayed around it.

eventually, after researching the issue (and getting at least 15 different dirty looks from my clean-minded spouse), i discovered that i could clean it all out with a substance called goo gone. the only problem, of course, was that the label indicated that if the goo gone ended up in contact with heat, hilarity would not ensue.

oh, how i fretted! i did not want my laundry machine to blow our family to kingdom come. but i also knew that BS needed to do a load of whites, and he was going to be most unhappy should his clothing end up candy-striped. so i said a little prayer, took a little dab and wiped down the drum. and lo and behold, it WORKED! and more importantly, WE DIDN’T END UP RIDING OUR HOUSE THROUGH THE SKIES TO VISIT THE WIZARD OF OZ!

joy!

so now, i’m careful to check pockets, though a stray piece of gum or penny often escapes my search.

but i’m still mystified: somehow, even though i separate whites from lights from darks; even though i measure my detergent and follow instructions — i cannot get hellboy’s socks clean! what do these kids DO in their socks? i have tried bleach. I have tried baking soda. i have tried drinking a glass of shiraz to try and not care about it.

but Jaysus! my kids walk around in the dirtiest, stinkiest  socks on the planet. and short of buying new ones on a monthly basis, i am stumped as to what to do. i have clearly failed the laundry mom experience.

somewhere, my home economics teacher is laughing.


4 Responses  
  • Scott G writes:
    March 31st, 2010 at 7:25 am

    I don’t even separate colors for the kids’ clothes. Hell, I’ve only recently started washing Alpha’s clothes separately from Beta’s (and only if they actually manage to keep them separate themselves, since I can’t remember who owns what unless it’s green/Alpha – or pink/Beta). Frankly, I’m amazed you manage to keep the socks paired long enough for them to build up any kind of crud. I have a whole shelf full of lonely socks that shall probably never see their partners again. Yes, perhaps their whites don’t get as white as they could with a separate washing (and occasional bleach), but it’s not like they wear them for such a long period that they can go grey – they practically get a new set of clothes every 12-18 months.

    Now, the parental hampers keep whites separate from colors. Unlike the children, I don’t outgrow my things (except in bad ways!) fast enough to avoid having my socks become less than brilliantly white.

    On the other hand, your kids may just have feet that produce larger amounts of sweat (and/or more acidic sweat) than “normal” (whatever that is). I know my brother wore his shoes out from the INSIDE without exception while we were growing up – his foot sweat would destroy first his socks and then the insides of his shoes without exception. Kinda gross. And we learned early on to hold our breath if we had to pick up his sneakers (and maybe wash our hands afterwards). If this is the case, you are doomed – there really is no choice but to buy new socks on a regular basis. (There probably is cream or special socks or something available these days but, really… just buying new socks is likely far cheaper.)

  • MomZombie writes:
    March 31st, 2010 at 8:48 am

    Once, a blue ink pen managed to slosh its way though the wash and rinse cycle undetected. It did not, however, enjoy its amusement park spin in the dryer. It blew its top and sprayed its blue blood all over our clothes and the dryer drum. Like you, I tried cleaning solutions and fretted about subsequent explosions. Over time the matter rectified itself. We still have the blue streaks.

  • Holly writes:
    April 4th, 2010 at 10:32 pm

    Goo Gone is fantastic.

    I’m on the other end of the laundry spectrum — which is not necessarily a good thing. I’m a freak about it and therefore, it drives me insane. Literally. If I’m snippy at my kids or husband, it’s usually because something in the laundry has put my panties in a wad. So to speak.

    Whites: I take a bucket and soak socks in hot hot hot water with tons of bleach and detergent. It’s best when I change the water daily and let this soak for a day or two. Then I wring it out in the sink and put it into the wash with a bleach load (all whites). I have a relatively small front loader and find this works best.

    I also LOVE LOVE LOVE the clorox bleach pens.

    Yes, bleach is not the best thing for the environment, but I consider it a necessity.

    With fear that you now think I’m totally crazy, I wanted to let you know… one of your posts was voted a Best of the Best JP for 2009 — come on over and check it out. And congratulations!

  • wrekehavoc writes:
    April 5th, 2010 at 6:09 am

    holly — you sound like a laundry champion — i am totally trying out your white sock in bucket method. i have a dream…not as lofty as MLK’s, of course, but a dream nonetheless… that my kids socks won’t be so darn icky!

    and thanks again so much — i am soooooo thrilled to have been selected as a winner in the just posts endeavor. thank you again so much for all you and alejna do!!!!!!


Leave a Reply


XHTML: You can use these tags: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>




SIDEBAR
»
S
I
D
E
B
A
R
«
»  Substance:WordPress   »  Style:Ahren Ahimsa
© Copyright 2002-2011 wrekehavoc.com