*Take The Gap Toothed Celebrity Test!*

i thought this timeline was kind of interesting and useful. maybe you will, too. then again, maybe not. but in light of current events, i am doing my best to understand it all. no mean feat, believe me.

one thing i find kind of interesting is that in 1947, the UN came up with a Partition Plan for both Jews and Arabs. this plan would divvy up the land so that everyone could get a homeland. the Jews accepted it. the Arabs did not. next thing you know it, israel becomes a state, and the arabs attack it until they lose. over the next 30+ years, they sporadically attack, only to lose again and again and sometimes even lose land in the process. incidentally, the countries voting against the Partition Plan is somewhat haunting: Afghanistan, Cuba, Egypt, Greece, India, Iran, Iraq, Lebanon, Pakistan, Saudi Arabia, Syria, Turkey, Yemen.

while i don't find it comforting to cheer on a warmonger like ariel sharon, i also find it difficult to gather sympathy for the palestinians. throughout this history, they are given opportunities to have their own land and their own governance. but because they have a problem with israel merely existing, they have refused land and self-governance.

i am also having trouble empathizing about how palestinian civilians are being killed by the israelis. who, then, pray tell, are being killed by the suicide bombers? of course. israeli civilians. it's all so absurd. and now college kids, full of that mass desire to be a part of something, are now clamoring to the side of the palestinians without thinking things completely through. it disturbs me.

do i think the palestinian people should have their own nation? yes, i do. do i understand why it has to be carved out of the tiniest nation in the middle east? not exactly, especially, since jordan already exists as a palestinian nation. but i imagine that people would be willing to give up some land for peace. the problem is that the folks out there have always been willing to talk a good game and then withdraw ambassadorial relations as it suits them. not to mention how the official palestinian authority is paying the families of the current set of “martyrs.” (so is saddam hussein. i read he now gives each family $20k.) i wonder what the female suicide bombers are promised as their reward in heaven. 75 virginal Chippendale dancers?

i just wish people would think about this a bit. i am trying. really, i am. i know it isn't easy; but people are so willing to jump one way or another without any thought.

i found my keyless remote. i found my keyless remote. ::skipping happily:: i went into my car to just make sure i truly, truly couldn't find the @#$%$@#% thing. and sure as shit, it was wedged really, really hard in between the driver's seat and the middle thingy. how the hell it managed that i could not tell you. but i am sooooo grateful.

(i still am a dumbass, though. never keep keys to an expensive car on such a crowded keychain!)

Etch-A-Sketch Technical Support

i am a dumbass. i am a dumbass. i am a dumbass.

i took my car to the carwash today, and somewhere, my volvo's keyless remote slipped off my keyring. and i have looked high and low, and i have asked every car wash employee for its whereabouts. and no one knows. i can't believe the damn thing is gone. and it is going to cost me a shitload of money, i am sure, to get a new one.

i am a dumbass.

while i'm thinking of it, check this out. i used to work with gramm's ex-wife. she is far nicer than he is.

well, well, well. remember my rant from the other day — the one where i wrote to my Congressional Representative, Jim Moran, about the ridiculous DC DMV? i guess it didn't hurt that i cc:'d Eleanor Holmes Norton (the DC Rep.) as well as Dr. Gridlock of the Washington Post. i sent that pup out on april 1. on saturday, april 6, i received a check for $40 from the DC DMV. dip me in shit and call me stinky. something that had taken 6 months to nearly accomplish in actuality only took, oh, a few days.

BS is my witness. and let me preface this: i am not pregnant. N-O-T not.

tonight, BC is on a “i wanna be a big sister” kick. she asked me if i could go to the hospital and go get my baby. those who know my circumstances know that this conversation brought a few tears to my eyes. but i hid them. and i explained that it takes some time before a baby is ready to be born.

BC insists that she is going to have a baby sister. so then, i asked BC what her sister's name is.

BC said: Dumb Slut.

i am really, really not making this up.

my daughter loves the don freeman “corduroy” stories. but she keeps calling that little teddy bear “quarter boy.” and it cracks me up.